It was unusual research, certainly; only a few studies had ever attempted to suss out what Daycares in bronx ny made a post-breakup friendship a success or a bust, and after her presentations, Griffith often took questions from other scientists and peers in her field. But the query she encountered most often was not about her conclusions, or her methodology, or her data analysis. The questions Friends after a breakup whether and how to stay friends with an ex—romantic partner are, as Griffith can attest, both complex and universal. To utter it during a breakup conversation is either a kind and helpful way to lessen the pain of parting or the cruelest part of the whole endeavor, depending on who you ask. An attempt to stay friends may be a kindness if it suggests an Sex games mobile apps or a respect that transcends the circumstances of the romantic relationship, for instance.
F ew relationship questions are as polarizing as whether or not you should stay Hippie dates review with an ex. Anecdotal evidence feeds arguments on both sides — but what do the experts say?
Under no circumstances should a relationship that was abusive, manipulative or toxic transition into a friendship, Sussman says. One studyfor example, found that friendships between exes were more likely to have Western mass speed dating qualities, and less likely to have positive ones, than cross-sex platonic friendships.
That may be especially true if you were never friends before you dated, Sussman says.
Sussman also says there are potential downsides to staying friendly with an ex. Are you giving the new relationship a [fair] chance to really flourish or blossom?
When to stay friends with an ex
Ashley Brett, a psychology researcher in her late 20s who asked to use a pseudonym to protect her identityknows that struggle well. After breaking up with her boyfriend of about a year and a half, Brett stayed friends with him — and fell into an on-again, off-again relationship that lasted for more than five years.
Friends after a breakup Fuck locals bbw in Salisbury that repeatedly falling back on friendship allowed her to numb some of the pain of each breakup — which may seem like a good strategy, but can actually prevent future growth.
The lines are murkier for couples without children, but Sussman says those who dated when they were young, were friends first, dated casually or were together only for a short time are good candidates for friendship. Robin Zabiegalski, a year-old writer who lives in Vermont, is a notable counterexample.
The evolution of the desire to stay friends with your ex
The research supports that notion. Studies suggest that couples who remain in contact for the same Finding girlfriend in dubai — whether those are pragmatic or sentimental — are more likely to have successful friendships, while staying in touch because of unresolved romantic desires is a predictor of negative outcomes.
If you decide to try a friendship with an ex, Sussman suggests taking a break first. A lot of insight can come with time and space apart. That goes for social media as well as in-person interactions.
Above all, regularly reassess how the friendship makes you feel, and be honest with yourself. Write to Jamie Ducharme at jamie. Here's What Experts Say. By Jamie Ducharme.
Get our Health Newsletter. up to receive the latest health and science news, plus answers to wellness questions and expert tips. Please enter a valid address.
Please attempt to up again. Up Now. An unexpected error has occurred with your up.
Thank you! For your security, we've sent a confirmation to the address you entered. Click the link to confirm your subscription and begin receiving our newsletters.
We often claim to want to remain friends, but is it actually possible?
If you don't get the confirmation within 10 minutes, please check your spam folder. Each product we feature has been independently selected and reviewed by our editorial team. If you make a purchase using the links included, we may earn commission. Related Stories. Crystal meth high effects have reached your limit of 4 free articles.
Get unlimited access to TIME. Already a print subscriber?
Go here to link your subscription. Thank you for reading TIME.
You have a limited of free articles.